A decade ago…I wouldn’t have dreamed of having my own website. Why? Because you either had to pay a lot of money or have something on Geocities. That and it was really complicated and back then I was probably busy getting fired from some awful minimum-wage job. Now…I’m all grown up AND you can do this shit for free. And it’s so easy that even a dickface like me can figure it out. Kind of.
Everyone else can start personalized websites and blogs discussing yoga and how great it is to be a vegan so I figure….I can hop on board and do the same thing. Only by ‘yoga’ I mean drumming and drinking scotch and not particularly doing anything to improve the world and by ‘vegan’ I mean I love me a good turkey bunwich.
So here’s the deal: I drum. A lot. I have my own bands and you can also hire me to play on YOUR albums. I also sometimes sing, play keys, write and record my OWN music, write wacky stories that involve a lot of cursing AND I’m an actor. I need a consolidated location to use as a repository for all the shit that I do so I can refer “important” people to “my website” so it looks like I actually “matter”. And I can do really “irritating shit” like “use quotations when unnecessary”. And why can I do that? Because as stated previously, I now have my own website and inadvertently am completely drunk with power. No….wait. I’m just drunk.
Until then, swear like nobody is listening and eat with your mouth open like nobody’s watching.
Oh…and follow me on Twitter and we can Tweet each other’s twats.